9. From Richard Petty Motorsports: A check that doesn’t actually bounce… but we can’t guarantee that next month.
8. From Earnhardt Ganassi Racing: One free payback “incident” for any driver of choice, courtesy Juan Pablo Montoya’s front bumper.
7. From Tommy Baldwin Racing: Can be one of the Top 10 Kids who eat free at Golden Corral.
6. From NEMCO Motorsports: A chance to run 500 laps… for the WHOLE year! Bonus incentives for running five laps or less.
5. From Stewart-Haas Racing: Lifetime supply of Burger King along with the “Freshman 15” Carl’s health programs never gave him the chance to gain. Free temper tantrum lessons included.
4. From Penske Racing: Kurt Busch’s entire pit crew… for some reason, they all immediately volunteered to leave when told they could work for anyone else.
3. From Red Bull Racing: Beautiful, empty 10,000 square-foot race shop in Mooresville, along with a fleet of race-ready Toyotas at bargain prices. Talks cut off when Edwards reminded RBR management they would actually have to pay him… not the other way around.
2. From Hendrick Motorsports: The opportunity to carry Jimmie Johnson’s jockstrap.
1. From Joey Logano: A free ice cream and a “pretty, pretty, pretty please don’t ruin my career!” Oh wait… he took that one. Was wondering what made the difference with Roush Fenway…