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The LOL PLace

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awsum14

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Post Thu Jun 28, 2012 5:41 am

Re: The LOL PLace

After 35 years of marriage, a husband and wife came for counseling. When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the years they had been married. On and on and on: neglect, lack of intimacy, emptiness, loneliness, feeling unloved and unlovable, an entire laundry list of unmet needs she had endured.
Finally, after allowing this for a sufficient length of time, the therapist got up, walked around the desk and after asking the wife to stand, he embraced and kissed her long and passionately as her husband watched - with a raised eyebrow.
The woman shut up and quietly sat down as though in a daze. The therapist turned to the husband and said, "This is what your wife needs at least 3 times a week. Can you do this?"

"Well, I can drop her off here on Mondays and Wednesdays, but on Fridays, I fish."
If at first you don't succeed, don't give up
Try Harder
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Mrs B

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Post Fri Jun 29, 2012 4:41 am

Re: The LOL PLace

A Texas farmer goes to Australia for a vacation. There he meets an Aussie farmer and starts talking with him. The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says, "Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large."

Then they walk around the ranch a little, and the Aussie shows off his herd of cattle. The Texan immediately says, "We have longhorns that are at least twice as large as your cows."

The conversation has really gone south when the Texan sees a herd of kangaroos hopping through the field. He asks, "And what the heck are those?"

The Aussie replies with an incredulous look, "Don't you have any grasshoppers in Texas?"
There are two ways of doing things...the wrong way and my way.

What, don't want to do it my way, there is a fine for that.
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beaverpond

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Post Sat Jul 07, 2012 11:08 am

Re: The LOL PLace

HOW ADAM GOT EVE:

Nothing like a good Bible story to make your day.

Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely.

So, God asked him, “What’s wrong with you?”

Adam said he didn’t have anyone to talk to.

God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and it would be a woman.

He said “This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you have had a disagreement. She will praise you! She will bear your children. She will never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to care of them. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it.”


Adam asked God “What will a woman like this cost?”

God replied “An arm and a leg.”

Then Adam asked “What can I get for a rib?”

Of course the rest is history………….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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The Nascar Sprint Cup Champion For 2014 Is...
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HiddenHollow

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Post Sun Jul 08, 2012 9:35 am

Re: The LOL PLace

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: Good one!

Wish Adam hadn't been such a cheapskate. ;) :lol: Now, we're all paying for his penny pinching. :( ;) :lol:
"I'll wreck my mom to win a championship. I'll wreck your mom to win a championship." - Tony Stewart, November 17, 2011

"Fight For Four" - Annalee, March 27, 2012

#StandWithSmoke #14in14
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Smokeshow14

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Post Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:03 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling.

Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.


There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.
Cup: 14, 1, 29, 88, 99, 11, 17, 39, 15, 5, 2, 16
NW: 7, 31, 3, 11, 60, 88, 12
Trucks: 9, 88, 3, 7, 17, 31
IRL: 10, 11, 12, 26, 3, 38, 27
RIP Dan Wheldon
"Fight for Four"- Annalee
You got to have a big gigantic drum kit.
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Mrs B

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Post Mon Jul 09, 2012 6:47 am

Re: The LOL PLace

A WOMAN’S POEM

He didn’t like the casserole
And he didn’t like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn’t perk the coffee right
He didn’t like the stew.
I didn’t mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and
Smacked the crap out of him…
Like his mother used to do.
…………………………………………………

I love a good poem, don’t you?!?!
There are two ways of doing things...the wrong way and my way.

What, don't want to do it my way, there is a fine for that.
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ndunn

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Post Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:29 am

Re: The LOL PLace

Mrs. B this poem is the best. That will teach him to complain.
The Military Thanks You For Standing Behind Them. If You Can't Do that You Can Always Stand In Front Of Them.....Think About It.....

Thank you to those who took a step forward to save the rest who stand still.
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HiddenHollow

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Post Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:07 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

Mrs B wrote:A WOMAN’S POEM

He didn’t like the casserole
And he didn’t like my cake.
He said my biscuits were too hard
Not like his mother used to make.
I didn’t perk the coffee right
He didn’t like the stew.
I didn’t mend his socks
The way his mother used to do.
I pondered for an answer
I was looking for a clue.
Then I turned around and
Smacked the crap out of him…
Like his mother used to do.
…………………………………………………

I love a good poem, don’t you?!?!

Does that approach really work on Beaver, Mrs B? Sometimes I wonder about him. ;) :lol: :lol:
"I'll wreck my mom to win a championship. I'll wreck your mom to win a championship." - Tony Stewart, November 17, 2011

"Fight For Four" - Annalee, March 27, 2012

#StandWithSmoke #14in14
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Allied Hero

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Post Sun Jul 15, 2012 7:34 am

Re: The LOL PLace

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead, and one's a blonde. Two guards brings the brunette forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

Suddenly the brunette yells, "earthquake!!"

Everyone is startled and looks around. She manages to escape.

The angry guards then bring the redhead forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

The redhead then screams, "tornado!!"

Yet again, everyone is startled and looks around. She too escapes execution.

By this point, the blonde had figured out what the others did. The guards bring her forward, and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She also says no, and the executioner shouts, "Ready . . . Aim . . ."

The blonde shouts, "fire!!"

^_^
When I grow up, I want to be just like Tony Stewart. The day I race my first Sprint Cup race, I'll know I made it.
♥ GO SMOKE! ♥
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HiddenHollow

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Post Sun Jul 15, 2012 12:07 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

ahhhhhhh... The LOL Place wouldn't be complete without a blonde joke. :lol: :lol:
"I'll wreck my mom to win a championship. I'll wreck your mom to win a championship." - Tony Stewart, November 17, 2011

"Fight For Four" - Annalee, March 27, 2012

#StandWithSmoke #14in14
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beaverpond

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Post Wed Jul 25, 2012 3:17 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

cross the pasture.jpg
cross the pasture.jpg (27.25 KiB) Viewed 1087 times


HOW FAST CAN YOU RUN :!: :?: :!: :?: :!: :?: :!: :?: :!: :?: :!: :?:
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The Nascar Sprint Cup Champion For 2014 Is...
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HiddenHollow

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Post Fri Jul 27, 2012 9:13 am

Re: The LOL PLace

I don't have to be faster than the bull... just faster than you! :mrgreen: ;) :lol: :lol:
"I'll wreck my mom to win a championship. I'll wreck your mom to win a championship." - Tony Stewart, November 17, 2011

"Fight For Four" - Annalee, March 27, 2012

#StandWithSmoke #14in14
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beaverpond

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Post Tue Jul 31, 2012 6:25 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

Driver Takes Revenge on Second Driver

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... tCu34Tq94I



I could not stop laughing and I can think of a few people who would do this.
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The Nascar Sprint Cup Champion For 2014 Is...
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ndunn

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Post Tue Jul 31, 2012 6:44 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

beaverpond wrote:HOW ADAM GOT EVE:

Nothing like a good Bible story to make your day.

Adam was hanging around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely.

So, God asked him, “What’s wrong with you?”

Adam said he didn’t have anyone to talk to.

God said that He was going to make Adam a companion and it would be a woman.

He said “This pretty lady will gather food for you, she will cook for you, and when you discover clothing, she will wash it for you. She will always agree with every decision you make and she will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you have had a disagreement. She will praise you! She will bear your children. She will never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to care of them. She will never have a headache and will freely give you love and passion whenever you need it.”


Adam asked God “What will a woman like this cost?”

God replied “An arm and a leg.”

Then Adam asked “What can I get for a rib?”

Of course the rest is history………….!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



He also got what he paid for didn't he? :)
The Military Thanks You For Standing Behind Them. If You Can't Do that You Can Always Stand In Front Of Them.....Think About It.....

Thank you to those who took a step forward to save the rest who stand still.
<<

HiddenHollow

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Joined: Mon Jun 15, 2009 11:44 am

Location: Tampa, FL

Post Wed Aug 01, 2012 11:11 am

Re: The LOL PLace

beaverpond wrote:Driver Takes Revenge on Second Driver

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=pl ... tCu34Tq94I



I could not stop laughing and I can think of a few people who would do this.

I guess the U.S. doesn't have the corner on jerk drivers. I've also seen similar idiotic moves. :? ;) :lol:
"I'll wreck my mom to win a championship. I'll wreck your mom to win a championship." - Tony Stewart, November 17, 2011

"Fight For Four" - Annalee, March 27, 2012

#StandWithSmoke #14in14
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