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The LOL PLace

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duffygoofy

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Post Wed Sep 12, 2012 10:30 am

Re: The LOL PLace

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duffygoofy

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Post Wed Sep 12, 2012 10:33 am

Re: The LOL PLace

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beaverpond

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Post Fri Sep 21, 2012 3:13 am

Re: The LOL PLace

No English dictionary has been able to explain the difference between the two words "complete" and "finished" in a way that is easy to understand.

Some people say there is no difference between COMPLETE and FINISHED, but there is:

When you marry the right one, you are COMPLETE...

And when you marry the wrong one, you are FINISHED...

And when the right one catches you with the wrong one, you are COMPLETELY FINISHED. :lol:
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beaverpond

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Post Mon Sep 24, 2012 2:11 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

The Ferrari F1 Racing Team recently fired the whole pit crew to employ some young unemployed youths from Liverpool. The decision to hire them was brought on by a documentary on how unemployed youths in the Liverpool area can remove a set of car wheels in less than four seconds without proper equipment. This was thought to be a good move as most races are won and lost in the pits these days, and Ferrari would thus have an advantage.

However, Ferrari soon encountered a major problem: Not only were the lads changing the tires in under four seconds, but within another ten seconds had also repainted, renumbered, and sold the vehicle to the McLaren team.
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Schmoopy1000

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Post Mon Sep 24, 2012 6:15 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

beaverpond wrote:The Ferrari F1 Racing Team recently fired the whole pit crew to employ some young unemployed youths from Liverpool. The decision to hire them was brought on by a documentary on how unemployed youths in the Liverpool area can remove a set of car wheels in less than four seconds without proper equipment. This was thought to be a good move as most races are won and lost in the pits these days, and Ferrari would thus have an advantage.

However, Ferrari soon encountered a major problem: Not only were the lads changing the tires in under four seconds, but within another ten seconds had also repainted, renumbered, and sold the vehicle to the McLaren team.

LOL
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beaverpond

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Post Wed Oct 03, 2012 10:15 am

Re: The LOL PLace

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...or trying to figure out just what that last possible lap is that you can go on the track before running out of fuel and saying "Oh crap, we should have pitted on the last go around and the cc blaming the driver for not saving enough fuel" :x :lol:
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beaverpond

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Post Wed Oct 10, 2012 1:19 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

Today I had to go to Sears.
As I approached the entrance,
I noticed a driver looking for a parking space
I flagged the driver and pointed out a handicap parking space that was open and available.
The driver looked puzzled, rolled down her window and said, "I'm not handicapped!"
Well, as you can imagine, my face was red!
"Oh, I'm sorry" I said. "I saw your Obama bumper sticker and just assumed that you suffer from a mental disorder."
She gave me the finger and screamed some nasty names at me.
Boy! Some people don't appreciate it when you're just trying to help them out!
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beaverpond

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Post Fri Oct 12, 2012 5:21 am

Re: The LOL PLace

Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a Lafayette Street tavern. After last call, the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the street for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car, which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally the man started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night), flicked the blinkers on and off, honked the horn, and then switched on the lights. He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little, and then remained still for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left. At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over, and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the man. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."
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beaverpond

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Post Fri Oct 19, 2012 2:54 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

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beaverpond

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Post Fri Oct 19, 2012 2:58 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CI8UPHMz ... r_embedded

This video is a riot, the woman thinks all deer crossing signs mean they are actual deer crosswalks...you have to see it to understand it because there is no way I could explain it to do it justice.

This went up on October 8th, which was only 11 days ago and has had more than 4.1 million hits.
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beaverpond

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Post Fri Oct 19, 2012 4:22 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

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Rochelle

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Post Fri Oct 19, 2012 4:44 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

beaverpond wrote:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CI8UPHMzZm8&feature=player_embedded

This video is a riot, the woman thinks all deer crossing signs mean they are actual deer crosswalks...you have to see it to understand it because there is no way I could explain it to do it justice.

This went up on October 8th, which was only 11 days ago and has had more than 4.1 million hits.


quote="beaverpond"]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CI8UPHMzZm8&feature=player_embedded

This video is a riot, the woman thinks all deer crossing signs mean they are actual deer crosswalks...you have to see it to understand it because there is no way I could explain it to do it justice.

This went up on October 8th, which was only 11 days ago and has had more than 4.1 million hits.[/quote]

Seriously? How could they keep from laughing in her face? OMG, you need to put the Daffy cartoon directly under this link. What a maroon...
"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe" - Friedrich Nietzsche
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beaverpond

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Post Thu Oct 25, 2012 3:33 am

Re: The LOL PLace

Sent that video to my cousin who sent it to his brother-in-law who sent me a response.

Wish you could have seen my husband. He was laughing so hard that he was crying. :mrgreen:

Of course my cousin is no help, "tell your husband to go stand out by these signs, because according to this woman...that is wear all the deer are." :lol:

My cousin told me his brother-in-law has not gotten a deer in a couple of years, he is starting to feel desperate and is almost willing to try anything...including the front end of his wife's car. Would not want to ruin the new jeep after all. :shock:
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beaverpond

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Post Thu Oct 25, 2012 3:34 am

Re: The LOL PLace

I did my nurse's training at a hospital in Liverpool, England. My fellow students and I had little money for meals, so we ate the awful food provided at the hospital complex.

We often took our breaks in the kitchen and sometimes kindly visitors would give us some of the treats they had brought for patients who had not wanted to eat them.

One night a woman brought a pie to the kitchen and said to me, "Would you eat this up, love?"

Another student and I devoured every delicious crumb!

Soon our benefactor returned, however, and asked, "Is me 'usband's pie 'ot yet, dearie?" (hot yet?)
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Smoke14Wins

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Post Mon Oct 29, 2012 5:20 pm

Re: The LOL PLace

What begins with T, ends with T, & has T in it?????
























































































Answer: Teapot
Smoke
"We know that Mother Nature is a woman. If she were a man, there would be no rain on race day."
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